In the profound philosophical landscape of Tibetan Buddhism, the concept of "bardo" signifies a liminal state, a transitional period between significant life phases. This encompasses the passage from death to rebirth, as well as the continuous journey from birth to death. The discussions explored within "Between-States" delve into these bardo concepts, examining their resonance with themes of acceptance, interconnectedness, and impermanence. These explorations are cast against the backdrop of familial relationships—children and parents, marriage and friendship—and the spheres of work and creativity. The overarching aim is to illuminate novel perspectives and foster enduring happiness as individuals navigate the inevitable currents of existence.
Lauren Groff’s "Brawler" as a Portal to Understanding Life’s Difficulties
Acclaimed author Lauren Groff posits that art possesses a unique capacity to engage with pain and suffering, transforming it into a gateway for deeper comprehension and creation. "One of the things art can do is engage with pain and suffering, whether it’s our own or others’," Groff stated, "and turn it into a portal. A portal to making something beautiful out of something that’s really rough and hard." This transformative power is vividly illustrated in her latest short story collection, Brawler. The stories within this collection, published by Riverhead Books, are presented as such portals, offering insightful and compassionate examinations of the traumas that life inevitably presents. Groff articulated that the narratives explore "the ways we hurt one another, often without meaning to, and the ways violence persists through generations." Simultaneously, they reveal humanity’s "beautiful willingness to make things good, and to be good, and to push toward goodness in other people."
A Literary Journey Marked by Acclaim and Activism
Born in Cooperstown, New York, in 1978, Lauren Groff has established herself as a significant voice in contemporary literature. Her prolific career includes five novels, such as the critically lauded Fates and Furies (2016) and Matrix (2021), alongside three collections of short stories. Her literary achievements have been recognized with prestigious awards, including The Story Prize and the Joyce Carol Oates Prize. Furthermore, Groff has been a finalist for the National Book Award on three occasions. Her distinguished career is further underscored by a Guggenheim Fellowship and her inclusion in Time magazine’s 100 Most Influential People list in 2024.
Beyond her literary endeavors, Groff has become a visible advocate for intellectual freedom and resistance against censorship. She currently resides in Gainesville, Florida, with her husband, where they co-own and operate a bookstore named The Lynx. The establishment of The Lynx was a direct response to the increasing instances of book bans within the state. The bookstore actively champions and displays titles that have faced censorship, operating under the powerful and defiant motto, "Watch Us Bite Back." This commitment to open discourse and the defense of literary expression highlights a dedication that extends beyond the written word.
Navigating Ambition and the Impermanence of Existence
In a recent conversation, Groff discussed her evolving relationship with ambition, the delicate balance between regret and repair, and the liberating influence of swimming on her creative process. Her reflections offer a profound insight into the philosophical underpinnings of her work and her personal journey.
Kyoto’s Lessons in Impermanence and Craftsmanship
Last year, Groff undertook a pilgrimage to Kyoto, Japan, a journey inspired by her deep admiration for The Tale of Genji, the seminal 11th-century Japanese novel. She describes the classic work as being "patterned with recurring images and ideas: swiftly fading cherry blossoms, clouds moving through the sky, autumn leaves, the aching transience of life on this planet." This immersion in the world of Genji brought a heightened awareness of impermanence during her visit to Kyoto.
"Oh, yes. That was one of the great lessons from the trip," Groff affirmed. "I remember watching somebody make tea with incredible care and, as I was watching, thinking that tea is meant to be drunk. It’s not meant to stay around forever." The meticulous attention devoted to the sensory and aesthetic nuances of such a fleeting moment left a significant impression. "Seeing the attention that was paid to all the sensory and aesthetic details of an ephemeral moment like that had a big impact on me." In Kyoto, Groff found herself captivated by the Japanese culture of craft. This philosophy, she explained, prioritizes profound engagement with one’s work in the present moment over the pursuit of external accolades or the desire to surpass others. "In Kyoto, I fell in love with the Japanese culture of craft, which is about loving what you’re doing as deeply as you can in the moment rather than achievement and being better than other people."
The Shifting Landscape of Artistic Ambition
The drive for achievement, particularly within the American cultural context, is a pervasive force, especially for artists. "I do, because it’s hard to grow up here in the US and not feel ambitious, especially as an artist," Groff acknowledged. Her aspiration is to embody the spirit of Japanese craftspeople, a pursuit that often conflicts with her upbringing and past experiences, notably her long tenure as a competitive swimmer. "I really want to become more like Japanese craftspeople. That’s the ideal, but it goes against everything that I was taught, especially because I was a competitive swimmer for a long time. What is athleticism but pitting yourself against other people?"
However, as Groff matures, she perceives a growing "grace of aging as an artist, of being able to turn my back on a lot of the heavy ambition that drove me for a long time." While she recognizes that completely relinquishing this ambition may be an unattainable goal, she is committed to navigating its influence with a newfound understanding of craft and impermanence. "I don’t think I’ll ever be able to completely push that ambition to the side. But I’ll try, with my new understanding of craft and impermanence, of fleeting beauty. How nothing that we’re doing now is going to last. The sun will explode. Everything will be gone." This perspective reflects a deep contemplation of existential realities, a theme that permeates her literary output.
The Melancholy Undercurrents of Brawler
A defining characteristic of Groff’s latest collection, Brawler, is its pervasive sense of melancholy. Reflecting on the selection process for the stories, Groff explained that while no singular theme initially guided her choices, the melancholic tone emerged organically. "When I sat down with about eighteen stories I’d written over the years, I didn’t have a particular theme in mind, but I think the melancholy is from being here in the United States of America at this time and watching it all fall apart and crumble, and having two boys who could be drafted. And loving having had children, but now seeing them about to leave home. And having older parents. There’s just a profound melancholy right now in life." This statement underscores a deep personal connection to the contemporary socio-political climate and the universal experiences of family and aging, which contribute to the collection’s emotional resonance.
Acceptance and Surrender in the Face of Reality
The bardo teachings offer a framework for accepting reality without succumbing to resignation. In Groff’s story, "Between the Shadow and the Soul," the protagonist experiences a profound awakening upon meeting someone new. This awakening, however, coexists with her commitment to her marriage, leading to a re-dormancy of the awakened part of herself. Groff refutes the interpretation that this represents giving up. "I don’t see it at all as giving up," she asserts. "I think she comes to an understanding of the inchoate things that are happening inside her. She accepts—surrenders to—reality. She sees what’s going on for her emotionally and then makes a choice to be with her husband, this wounded person whom she loves deeply."
Surrendering to reality, she elaborates, involves confronting and living with difficulty rather than evading it. "It’s about accepting dark parts of yourself and loving them, even if you haven’t ever loved them before." This process is presented as an integral aspect of the human experience. "It’s part of being a human on this planet. It’s very easy to not surrender. To turn on Netflix or take a nap—I love doing both of those things, I’m not judging anyone. But instead, we can sit with the discomfort, knowing it’s a necessary coming to understanding." This nuanced understanding of surrender emphasizes a courageous embrace of one’s internal landscape and external circumstances.
Authorship and Agency in Life’s Narrative
The bardo between birth and death is conceptualized as a period where individuals act as the architects of their lives, shaping their trajectories through their choices. When asked if she feels like the artist of her own life, Groff offers a dualistic response. "That’s the most fascinating question, because the answer is obviously no and yes." She acknowledges the significant influence of her upbringing: "I mean, I was given a lot. My parents are the best parents on the planet. They allowed me to read as much as I wanted, they gave me education. And I was raised in a time and a place when there wasn’t this urgent feeling that everything was going to fall apart. It was a graceful moment in the United States, in my hometown in upstate New York. So I was authored by that."
However, she also recognizes the agency in personal decision-making: "At the same time, I’ve made choices that have shaped my path." Groff further illustrates this concept with an anecdote about a friend who, despite a challenging childhood and subsequent imprisonment, found a path to personal growth and activism. "There’s also the situation where we’re authored by a troubled childhood, by instability. This was true for a friend of mine who ended up in prison and had this come-to-Jesus moment where he said, ‘Even though I’m stuck here, and everything’s awful—the food’s bad, there’s noise, I’m afraid for my life all the time—I’m going to use this to make myself a better person.’ He did it through meditation, and when he got out of prison, he became an activist. He was authored by a harsh environment yet shifted that into a beautiful sense of, ‘I’m taking control of my choices.’" This narrative highlights the profound capacity for self-authorship, even in the face of extreme adversity.
Moving Beyond Regret: The Power of Repair and Collective Action
The idea of actively reclaiming one’s narrative, of declaring, "OK, I’m taking over the narrative here," is particularly potent when contemplating the brevity of life and the desire to avoid future regrets. Groff is actively striving to live a life free from regret. "I’m trying to live in a way in which I will not have regrets." This involves a conscious effort to mend relationships and practice forgiveness, both for others and oneself. "It doesn’t mean I won’t have them, but it does mean I’m doing my best to mend relationships with people I’ve wounded. Part of that is forgiving other people and myself. And even forgiving people who are doing terrible things in this country, although they probably don’t deserve it. If I don’t forgive, I carry that with me, which doesn’t help anyone."
The establishment of The Lynx bookstore has been a significant step in this ongoing process of repair and forward momentum. "One thing that’s helping me get away from regret is opening our bookstore, The Lynx, which I’d dreamed of doing for a long time. I did it in order to take a stand and be political because Florida is a very right-wing state. Every day we make choices at the bookstore to shore up the community. A lot that I had regrets about hasn’t been ameliorated, but I’m working all the time to make things better." This initiative demonstrates a commitment to individual and collective responsibility, bridging the gap between past actions and future possibilities.
The Malleable Nature of Art and Writing
Groff’s description of living between regret and repair, between what has been done and what can be done, between individual and collective responsibility, speaks to a profound sense of "between-ness." This concept extends into her creative process. "For me, it’s the understanding that nothing I make is finished. What I create is given to other people to do as they will." She embraces the idea that her work is a living entity, continuously evolving. "I live within the acceptance state of my work being its own living thing, which is changing and moving and living underneath the surface, whether I can see it or not. That’s allowed me to welcome the fact that it will always be between. It’s always in the process of being completed by another person. Each new reader is changing it, and moving it, and making it a different thing than what I had foreseen. It’s beautiful that art is infinitely malleable, never static." This perspective underscores the collaborative nature of artistic interpretation and the enduring power of literature to transcend its original creation.
Swimming as a Catalyst for Creative Liberation
Groff’s journey into writing is intrinsically linked to her past as a competitive swimmer. She draws a powerful parallel between the discipline of swimming and the structure of formal poetry. "When I trained as a competitive swimmer, it was like formal poetry in that I was given a rigid structure, which allowed the liberation of my mind. The structure was the going back and forth, back and forth, for hours, and forcing my body to do its work, and the liberation was that this pushed my brain to do something radically different in my writing." This seemingly paradoxical relationship between constraint and freedom is a recurring theme in her reflections.
The state of suspension inherent in swimming, much like other "between-states," provides a unique opportunity for new insights. "During between-states—and swimming is a great example, a time when we’re literally in a state of suspension—we have a chance to see things in new ways. It sounds like this was very true for you." Groff emphatically agrees: "Absolutely. Swimming was active dreaming into whatever I was writing at the time, a moment when my brain was set loose and allowed to float off in any direction. I genuinely feel like I wrote a bunch of novels under the water." This imagery powerfully conveys the profound creative breakthroughs that occurred during her hours in the pool.
From Competitive Pools to Natural Ponds: A Shift in Focus
While competitive swimming is a distant memory for Groff, its influence on her creative development remains significant. "They do, especially because, as with my writing, I want to move away from all that." Her current connection to water has transitioned from the rigorous environment of the swimming pool to the tranquil embrace of a natural pond. "Toward the newt pond," she muses, reflecting a move "toward the joy and the beauty." During her pregnancies, the outdoor pools in Florida offered a respite from the heat, and she describes herself as "like a giant manatee." Though she no longer swims competitively, she finds solace and inspiration in the pond near her home, which is teeming with newts. "We have a little pond, which is full of newts, and the water is really dark. In the summer, I lie in there like a newt, very still, floating. I go to the pond as much as I can to fill myself with the magic in it. There’s some sort of spirit there that I love, that speaks to me." This intimate connection with nature offers a contemporary embodiment of the liminal states she explores in her work, a space for quiet contemplation and profound connection.
